We’ve all dealt with indecision at some point in our lives, especially in a work environment.
The trouble is, indecision comes with a really high price.
Being in limbo, without a clear decision to move forward keeps you stuck, unable to move forward… and yet, it can be really easy to wallow in a pool of decisions left unmade.
So WHY is it so difficult to make decisions?
Because thinking for ourselves, and making decisions for ourselves is confronting.
It’s so much easier to allow others to make the rules and tell us what to do. Our cultural and family biases often program us to search for and cling to the approval we receive in following the rules. We’ get really used to following the “leader” and doing things correctly. Rarely are we rewarded for making independent decisions and paving our own path. Making independent decisions comes with the potential for embarrassment, failure or some form of punishment.
Religion is a perfect example of this: a lot of people look to other individuals (such as religious leaders) to make decisions for them, rather than making those decisions themselves. Being in a passive role like this may seem easier at first, but is actually quite detrimental to happiness and personal development if it keeps you from from moving forward with confidence.
How can you be happy and confident your actions if you’re never encouraged to choose what creates happiness for you?
That lack of self-assurance translates into your leadership. Specifically, it diminishes your ability to make confident decisions and of course, your colleagues or team members will feel it too.
When you’re unable to make confident decisions on your own, it undermines and manifests low confidence in every aspect of your life, and other people will pick up on it as well.
People need decisiveness in their managers and business partners.
An assertive, decisive attitude shows that you have confidence in your abilities as well as your choices. It instantly amps up your credibility and trustworthiness.
Indecisiveness, on the other hand, detracts from your credibility, and limits your ability to attract the leadership and partnership opportunities you want most.
So where does indecision stem from?
One of the main contributing factors is analysis paralysis. This happens when you overthink every aspect and consequence of every possible decision that can be made. It’s like a game of chess in which a player sees hundreds of moves ahead with any play they make, and as such, they have a very tough time making a move at all.
This kind of downward spiral won’t just affect you personally. It will also impact your business, your colleagues and your employees too.
When you spend so much time overthinking things, you waste a lot of time and often don’t come to any decision at all. Your paralysis keeps everyone else stuck and frustrated in turn, and opportunities pass you and your organization by.
Solid analysis is important before making a choice so your decision is a well-informed one; however, at some point you have to stop analyzing and commit to some direction so you can move forward. At some point you have to cut off all the other options, make a choice and understand that this decision will lead you in the right direction, trusting that this will open up doors for you.
It’s also possible that the direction you choose won’t be the ideal one. You may have to course correct.
What’s most important is that you take SOME action regardless of what it is.
At times you do have to just make a decision, put plans into action and allow momentum to inform you of what to do next.
So often we’re looking for clarity so that we can make a decision and yet it’s making the decision and that actually creates clarity.
In a situation like this, where you’ve made a decision but soon after it doesn’t feel like the “right” one for you, it’s really important to listen to those feelings and trust your gut instinct. If you can’t trust your own intuition you’ll want to turn to someone you do trust for guidance and reassurance, whether that’s your Guides, or an established Mentor or Life coach, or a your Mastermind partners.
This isn’t a time to ask colleagues or family members about their opinion. They’re likely to offer biased advice instead of the objective, impartial feedback you’re after. With colleagues, in particular, you also run the risk of undermining how they view and listen to you in future situations. Sometimes (with less supportive or understanding colleagues) asking for advice to course correct previous decision can be seen as abdicating personal responsibility or displaying lack of self confidence. These aren’t traits you want to cultivate when in a position of leadership so it’s best to play it safe by asking for advice in a very safe space.
Avoiding this predicament is one of the reasons it’s so crucial to have a coach or mentor to turn to. They can provide a great sounding board for you to work through your decisions while allowing you the space to justify your actions to yourself without judgment or potential backlash. They’re just there to listen.
More importantly, working through your decisions or the consequences that follow with a mentor or coach is like a practice run that makes it easier for you to justify decision to others when needed.
Finally, when it comes to indecision, the most important thing to keep in mind is that every single decisions is an opportunity to learn and grow. Decisions can always be reversed or course corrected along the way if needed: nothing is really set in stone.
Should you find that you’ve made the “wrong” decision in a given situation, be gentle and compassionate with yourself. Forgive yourself, and then move towards the direction that feels more aligned.
Remember that once you’re in motion, it’s easy to change direction: it’s taking the first step forward that’s the most difficult.
It’s the Veza 2018 Goal Setting Intention Guide.
This is a special workbook I’ve created for our community (for free) to help you review your year and set intentional goals for the year to come. The first section is all about capturing this year’s accomplishments so I highly recommend downloading it if you’re wanting to talk new salary (or new role) in 2018.
Download your copy of the Veza 2018 Goal Setting Intention Guide here
p.s. After you grab your copy be sure to join us over in our private Facebook Community where we’ll be completing the workbook together and masterminding to create a game plan to magnetize your dream career (with the salary to match) in 2018.
SELF LOVE – Why do people keep talking about it??
The month of February is all about L – O – V – E. People are either prepping for Valentines or they are dreading or these days they are planning how they will express self-love during this month. The dread comes from the reminder of being single (by choice or not) as it is a perfect reminder of what a single person does not have in their life.
February is a beautiful month though. We see the color red and pink everywhere, people seem to be in a more of a romantic mode and there is a lightness in the air that represents hope, excitement and the awe for the marvel in their life.
This article today we talk about self-love. It is something that we experience within ourselves, when we have that awe and marvel within our own lives. Self-love is when we smile as acknowledge all the wonderful things that happening for us. Self-love is looking at ourselves in the mirror and acknowledging the beauty that was created, which is us, in our wholeness.
It doesn’t matter if you are single or in a relationship, it is all about having self-love first. The more you love yourself, the more others can love you. Our heart expands with the love for ourselves.
So how can you expand your heart to have more self-love and how will it impact your life?
Expansion in Self-love
Here are 3 ways that I teach expansion in self-love:
1. Journaling – this is so utterly important. It allows you to connect to your heart, your thoughts and your feelings. This connection will allow you to be in more self-acceptance.
2. Look at yourself in the mirror, really look at yourself. Allow yourself to stand in front of the mirror and look into your own eyes. Experience the love that you have for yourself. This exercise is quite difficult for some, so please have compassion for yourself as you do this exercise.
3. Self-care. At least once a week for 2 hours, do an activity which nurtures your soul and your being. This can be acupuncture to a bubble bath to painting. Whatever it may be for you, please schedule this time in.
How will this self-love impact your life?
This self-love will allow you to be more in alignment with what you want out of your life. This self-love will allow you to be more present to your desires and your needs. This self-love will allow you to attract all that you want in your life.
As you are reading about self-love and you are thinking to yourself, this is an area I need extra support on or you want to create something more in your life, check out the Wonder Women section below:)
Be the Wonder Woman that you are!
In the 3-hours, we can focus on whatever topic you need to be most supported on right now. Whether it be:
- your new business
- your career
- releasing ex-relationships
- opening your heart to a new relationship
- re-imagining your relationship with your body
- creating a game plan for the future.
It is time for you to take action.
This will help propel you forward to the next level.
This isn’t for you,
- if you just want to complain and not get to the core issue
- if you will not take any of the steps that you decide you want to take for yourself
- if you are attached to being a victim.
This is for you if you have been feeling:
- the need to do something different in your life
- feel satisfied but aren’t quite where you want to be
- know you are on the right path but need that one issue dealt with
- are ready to jump into the next stage
Become that Wonder Women that you are:)
The 3 hour strategy session is now $397 (valued at $700).
Email email@example.com to get yourself booked.
This offer is only valid to be used in February. This special offer is for new, current and old clients. It can be used in addition to your current coaching program.
I spent the last weekend with Amma, the hugging saint that has hugged over 32 million people around the world and WOW, it was once again another blissful and unexplainable experience.
This was my third time being hugged by Amma. I have been very fortunate to have visited her in her home in Amritapuri in Kerala prior to this weekend’s experience (of course she doesn’t remember me from the thousands that meet her each day, but I remember each experience vividly).
As I had geared up for this weekend, I had started noticing the love that I was surrounded by. Love showed up in my life through my family, my friends and strangers who felt like we had met before. Love showed up in my interactions with people whether it be in person, in text message, emails and phone calls. Love felt very presence in my life.
I had began to notice that I was much more open to love now than I have ever been before. I do credit Amma to opening my heart, showing me the pure love that she exhibits and showing me how it felt to be loved. I did notice that there were aspects of me that was not open to be being loved. As I have spent time reflecting on how I can be more in the energy of love, I have noticed this shifting as well.
One of my biggest lessons of the weekend was when I watched her interact with each person that approached her. She gave her undivided attention to each person and to each person, she made them feel special as if they were the only person in the world.
For me, this brought upon self reflection of how I treat myself and others. I came to realize that if I treated myself and others as special as each individual is, how blissful that would feel not only to myself but to them as well. I ask you “how often do you treat yourself as that special someone?” As I was reminded today as we fill ourselves with self-love, the greater the capacity it to love others.
Self-love comes in many forms. Self-love is the talks that you give yourself, the permission to live life the way you want, taking care of your mind, body, and soul on a daily basis and self-love is the relationship with yourself, others, money, body and the universe.
Take the 5 minutes each day to ask yourself:
a) How can I be in the energy of love today? What actions am I guided to take?
b) How am I taking care of my mind, body and soul today?
This quick exercise will allow you to grow that love inside yourself, so your world will become more loving externally.
Exciting Events coming up
June 19th – “Truths and Myths of Successful Startup Businesses” – www.byobfsuccessstartup.eventbrite.ca
Come learn from experts and entrepreneurs on tips on how to have a successful startup.
June 20th – “Wealthylicious Vancouver” – http://wealthyliciousvancouver.eventbrite.com/
Heal Your Money Stories, Activate Your Millionaire Mindset and Create Multiple Streams of Income.
July 8th – “Attract More Money and Live Healthier” – http://wp.me/P1HP20-7M
A 4 tele-call series on Attracting more Money and living healthier focusing on money mindset, and a 30-day action plan to achieve your goals. (A tele-call series is a group coaching program, where you will be provided a conference call number to dial into during call times and will be sent a recording incase you miss the live class. Email support is provided in between calls to answer all questions you may have)